Parent Code of Conduct

Your role as a parent or guardian has a tremendous impact on your child’s sports experience.

• Do not force an unwilling child to participate in sports.
• Remember children are involved in organized sports for their enjoyment, not yours.
• Teach your child to always play by the rules.
• Teach your child that hard work and honest effort are often more important than victory.
• Help your child work toward skill improvement and good sportsmanship in every game.
• Do not ridicule or yell at your child for making a mistake or losing a game.
• Set a good example. Children learn best by example.
• Applaud good plays by your team and by members of the opposing team.
• Do not publicly question the referee’s judgment and never their honesty.
• Recognize the value of volunteer coaches, referees, and officials and give them the respect they deserve.
• Support all efforts to remove verbal and physical abuse from youth sports activities.

Conversations Before the Game

Tell your child you love them regardless of the outcome. Let them know: “Go for it, give it your best shot, and have fun!”

During the Game

Kids are already processing a lot during a game. The coach may be giving instructions, teammates and opponents are talking, the crowd is cheering, and the referee is blowing the whistle.

Yelling instructions from the sideline usually adds confusion rather than helping. Sometimes the best thing you can do as a parent is simply be quiet, cheer positively, and encourage all players.

Cheer and acknowledge good plays by both teams.

After the Game

• Thank the officials for doing a difficult job.
• Thank the coaches for their efforts.
• Thank your opponents for a good game.
• Congratulate your child and teammates for their effort.
• Compliment individual players on the good plays they made.

During the Car Ride Home

• Point out a good play your child made during the game.
• Avoid criticizing or correcting mistakes.
• Ask open-ended questions about how the game was played rather than how many points were scored.

Examples:

• Did you have fun?
• Did you give it your best effort?
• What did you learn from the game?
• What was the best play you made, and how did it feel?

Remember: Coaches Coach. Referees Ref. Parents Cheer.

Before You Go Yelling at the Referee...

Before you disagree with a referee, remember:

• Referees are usually in a better position to see the play.
• Referees are trained in the Laws of the Game.
• Many decisions are based on the referee’s opinion.
• The referee’s decision is final.
• Referees are human and are usually volunteers.

Offside

Offside is difficult to judge because it depends on both timing and angle. The assistant referee is on the line and has the best position to make that decision.

Handball

Handling the ball is only a foul if it is deliberate, in the opinion of the referee. Not every ball that touches a hand or arm is a foul.

Fouls

Contact is only a foul if it is careless, reckless, or uses excessive force. Just because a player falls down does not automatically mean a foul happened.

Out of Bounds

The referee team must judge who touched the ball last and whether the entire ball crossed the line. These are judgment calls made in real time.

Throw-Ins

Throw-ins do not have to look perfect. Small mistakes are often considered trifling, and referees may allow play to continue.

Yelling rarely changes the call. It only shifts the focus away from the kids and makes the game less enjoyable for everyone.